disclaimer: i wrote this my first week in russia, with the intention of emailing it some1 who would be willing to post it for me in a timely fashion... given the internet situation in rural siberia (and perhaps my laziness), that never happened... but uhh here it is now!
Greetings from…siberia..!
For those of you who haven’t been keeping up with my whereabouts at all times and spaces these past couple of weeks, I should inform you that I have moved on from ze la france, and now find myelf in the motherland. Russia. I don’t really know how I ended up here but the short of it is that I am teaching English with an organization called “learning enterprises”, which seeks to teach English-speak to those around our world unfortunate enough to not be born in a place where english is their native tongue. The more im abroad the more thankful I am to know English. This is ish useful. Woo hoo capitalism/imperialism/hbo! I am teaching English in a village called Soleneshnoe. "soul-en-esh-noy-a" . I only just learned how to pronounce it without sounding like a compelte idiot. now I only sound like a part of an idiot. The village is in Siberia. Yeah, yeah… get all the permafrost/gulag/Stalin jokes out of ur system… if “middle of nowhere” could be epitomized by any place in the world, it is soleneshnoe. It is 3 hours from the nearest “city” which is named Biysk and Biysk is another three hours from the nearest airport (domestic flights only… don’t try a be bookin’ those roundtrips from JFK to soleneshnoe) in Barnaul which is a bit larger of a city 4 hours by plane from Moscow. if you have a chance, google-map this place, u will prob get a kick out of it. Although, im being a bit unfair. Soleneshnoe is pretty kickin’… yesterday I went to the “town center”… there is a supermarket, a bread/lemonade factory (don’t ask… apparently they go together now?) and some clothing stores AND a stadium where if I weren’t a complete fatass I could theoretically exercise AND a discotheque which I did frequent once. We went to “adult night” where 20 women aged 60 and up came to get their boogie on in this YMCA type joint. There was a disco ball and “mambo number 5” on the jukebox (sometimes I wonder what Lou Bega would say if he knew his song was being played and danced to by Siberian babooshkas) and Russian-red hair dye… it was very “scene”. It must be said that soleneshnoe is considered a “regional center” in these parts and that is frankly quite frightening to think about. THIS is where the other middle of nowhere villages in the surrounding area come for good times. God bless them all. But despite (or because of) its remoteness, this place is probably the most beautiful place I have ever seen. It is in the middle of the mountains and is surrounded by lakes and forests and hills and rivers and greenery like ya wouldn’t believe. If I ever saw “lord of the rings” I would probably liken it to the scenery in that movie but I haven’t so I won’t.
The village doesn’t have many paved roads and most of the houses from the outside look pretty, well…decrepit. lets just say this aint no Princeton Manor (that was new jersey reference for those not intimately familiar with the turnpike). Anyhoo, running water is a 50/50 thing and I haven’t used this many outhouses since 1899. but it is still a pretty comfortable place to live because my family is pretty pimp in soleneshnoe terms… meaning they have TWO cars, one of which is a brand new Toyota SUV. this is probably the only time in my life where I have ridden in an SUV that actually did off-roading on mountainous roads… usually it’s the typical soccer mom on her way to Wegmans to buy her family’s dinner or drive her kids to field hockey practice. The family has running (hot!) water, a shower, a toilet, but they do have their outhouses as well. The mom is an English teacher in the school we teach at and the dad is a bee-keeper??? I still haven’t really figured out what he does but I have gathered there is a bee place up in the mountains where he goes every morning to gather honey?? Apparently honey is a lucrative business in these parts. Screw investment banking… I know my future career. There are 2 kids.. a 3 year old girl, Yulia and 11 year old boy Andrei. (Julia and Andrew for those less Russian-ly inclined). They’re a great family and I really like living here. Another volunteer from gtown and I are living together with the fam.
We started teaching yesterday. I was really nervous about it cuz 12 year olds are intimidating. Especially when they are all blond and children-of-the-corn like, but it wasn’t so bad. The kids are actually really nice and I think they get a kick out of my horrible Russian, which I am forced to speak much more often than anticipated because NO ONE here speaks English. Meaning everyone’s English is worse than my Russian which should give you a vague idea of what level English we’re dealing with here. The other volunteer is the only other person I can speak English with.
The one question I get asked pretty often is what “stars” I have seen in America. One kid asked today if I have ever met Indiana Jones. I dunno what to tell them when they ask me about celebrities because I really haven’t seen anyone noteworthy but I also don’t want to disappoint them. Today I was about to tell them how reverend Al Sharpton came and spoke at Georgetown freshman year…but I knew that would go nowhere fast. So I settled on a little white lie telling them I saw George Clooney. Which isnt totally untrue… freshman year there was a huge rally at the national mall for Darfur and george (we’re on a first name basis now) came to be like the big celebrity speaker so Americans would, u know, care about genocide… but he didn’t come on stage until like 4 hours into the rally so I left before he came. I don’t remember why I was being such a party pooper, but I’ve never been a huge ER fan. In any case ... technically I was there.. right? Whatever it didn’t matter cuz most of the kiddies didn’t know george either and then I somehow got into explaining the genocide in darfur in a mix of english and battered Russian to a bunch of 11 year olds from Siberia who don’t know English, cant understand my russian, and are only slightly aware that Africa exists and well… that was just disastrous. Moral of the story: don’t lie when it comes to george.
Besides the whole “yes, Africa does exist” conversation I had with the kids I have really enjoyed teaching. The kids are so enthusiastic (well, most of them… we’ve always got those class clowns. Class clownage is a universal truth.) Furthermore, its pretty satisfying when at the beginning of class the kids don’t know some phrase and by the end of it they can actually say something. Today we mastered (mastered in the loosest sense of the word) the art of American small-talk: “how are you?” “I am fine”. ..Baby steps, baby steps. I don’t think we will have any Thorough’s on our hands by the time we leave but I mean, the English world will know that a small girl in siberia is doing fine today.
In all, this whole experience is really really cool. The family I live with is so awesome and kind and welcoming and open. Exceptionally so. The mom is a great cook and makes 3 meals a day. I haven’t had 3 square meals a day since… well ever. and they grow all the ingrediants in their backyard so this ish the real deal. Mostly its a lot of soups, potatoes, mayonnaise DRENCHED "salads"... most of the food im at least familiar with cuz ive had it at home growing up but i can imagine that some1 a bit less accostumed to russian cuisine might take issue with it. but hey, im fat and happy so thats all that matters.
Anyways, I will write again sometime soon? I don’t know. Internet here is hard to come by and facebook AND blogspot are blocked by I’m not sure who..the Russian govt.? the town of soleneshnoe?. I don’t really know but I am writing this on my laptop and will have to email it to some1 who will be able to post it for me. Damn commies.
Things I like about Siberia: TEA! I have never in my life drunk so much tea. Anytime there is a lull in conversation some one will inevitably ask “soo…. Tea?”. And everyone says yes and throws a little tea party then and there. Its nice, even though its summer and hot. I like tea. I bought my host family tea from this fancy Parisian tea place. The tea is called “American tea” but I still haven’t given it to them. I dunno why, I just haven’t. maybe tonight.
Also, in the mountains raspberries, strawberries, blueberries and any other conceivable berry just grow anywhere and everywhere. So if you are around a native there is an 80% chance that they will stop whatever they are doing at some point to bend down, pick berries and offer them to you. And they are so tasty. Except once some kid gave me these nasty blueberry like fruits which were very sour and bitter. I did not like those. But otherwise the berry thing is great
Things I don’t like about Siberia: Bands of cows (Cryps and bloods) roam the streets of soleneshnoe. India style. Well actually ive never been to India but ive seen pictures and they gots those milky, grade-A delights all up ons da streetz. Its really scary cuz they moo quite aggressively. I never thought id be so scared of a “moo” but trust me,.. u DON’T wanna piss off these cows cuz when they get a’mooing… theres no stopping them. And then one moos and then the other responds from 100 meters away and all of a sudden you are amidst a chorus of moos that you can’t escape. They roam around the same streets that people drive and walk on and apparently they know their way home at night. I have my doubts. In paris I complained about having to dodge doggy doo on the sidewalks but that was nothing compared to having to leap over MOUNDS of cow dung every couple of meters on the unpaved roads. I never thought I’d say it, but I miss the paris dog doo streets.
mardi 19 août 2008
mercredi 6 février 2008
et alors? je serai morte
theres about a million trillion things i should be doing now besides writing in this but, alas, i dont feel like it. i have a final on friday about ..well...i dont know. which is a problem. clearly. one of my classes (read: all of my classes) have absouletly no structure and the teacher just kind of goes up and babbles about something. in FRENCH of all languages.. (the NERVE!) and rarely is there even a powerpoint presentation involved. i mean cmon frenchies... get with the times. microsoft is where its at. i need the bullet-pointed outlines to make me concentrate or else i turn into a 9 year old boyw ith ADHD. im not demanding any fancy slide transition like fading or checkerboard or sound effects, not even any strategically placed word-art or dancing clip-art to spruce up the astehtic appeal of the powerpoint extravaganza... just SOMETHING so i dont leave the lecture with nothing on my paper besides the notes i passed to the person next to me and my doodles. ha, doodle. annnnywho, the class the final is for is called "les grands risques de la planète". so umm... apparently the planet is facing risks. me failing study abroad is one of them. anyways, i needed a break from reading about global warming and blah blah al gore blah blah how europe is so progressive and amerrrrica hates the planet and blah blah. just to let all u freedom-lovers know, europeans are talkin SMACK about americans behind your back. we should attack them... that'll teach them a lesson.
anyways, something weird i have noticed throughout my stay in francia is that everytime i talk to a french person, one of the first things they ask me once they hear that fierce american accent is "so... have u made friends with any french people?" and when i say "some, but its kind of hard with the language barrier" (read: "no, its kind of hard cuz ur all pretty frigid and reserved") and theyre like yeah... french people are hard to get to know. this happened twice in th past 24 hours. its so annoying. its like all french people know this about themselves and they get a kick out of pointing it out to me and stomping on all my dreams of ever truly immersing myself in this place. i think my french is still pretty shitty in terms of being completely fluent, but im at a point where i can communicate with frenchies and be understood and contribute to converstation. so its not just the language barrier. its parisiens with their icy-cold demeanor and chic haircuts. especially at sciences po. although, i have noticed that once u actually break the ice with a french eprson they have always been really really nice. so ive come to the conclusion that frenchies (yes, even parisians) are actually nice, warm and interested people, you just have to make a super effort to actually get to the their warm and fuzzy core. the same went with my roomate, who i think is even more friendly than the average parisian. shes never super bubbly at first but if i initate converstaion sehs really cool. thus, my goal for next semester: pounce on french kids in my classes until they become my friends. every. last. one of. them... i. like. writing. like. this. it. is. very. dramatic. dont. u .think. ? .
anyhooooo what else what else?? nothing, i will go be responsible now and read about the dangers of nuclear energy as an alternative to carbon. snoooooooozeeefest. ill be dead before this ish really affects me anyways. maybe that's what ill write for my 3-hour essay test on global warming. "et alors? je serai morte" fin.
things i like about france: they have this store here in france called "piccard" and basically it only sells frozen food. nothing else. when u walk into the store its like walking into the frozen food section of a supermarket but u magically by-pass all the vegetables and cereal and stupid crap... cut to the chase: pizza bagels and frozen lentils. anyways, its really weird and its the only store in france ive seen where they actually BAG your groceries for you. everywhere else is so annoying... here they just hurriedly scan all ur items and push them to the side and then make u pay really quick;ly cuz theres always a huge line behind u (when is there NOT a huge line to do ANYHTING in this country... i mean its not as bad as communist russia im assuming but pretty darn close) and then you are left to bag your own shit while the next person in line is starting to be helped. and the cashregister lady jsut pushes all the new person's things with yours so ur frantically trying to bag ur stupid groceries and then the plastic gets stuck together at the openning (u know what im talkin about) and u cant freakin open it and meanwhile gallons of some1 else's milk are being shoved over your way and crushing ur bread and omg its actually the most stressful thing i have ever experienced. no compassion from the check-out lady either... even if she sees u drowning in ur own gluttony and cant bag all the ccrap u just bought she wont stop and help u out or even wait like HALF a second before letting an avalanch of the person-behind-you's stuff fall into yours. wow im feeling my blood pressure rise jsut htinking about it. why did i bring this up? o yeah... piccarddd.... coolest store ever. i bought sorbet,,, mango and raspberry. i was very happy with my purchase.
things i dont like about france: no bagging ladies at the supermarket and frigid people. see above post
o, funny thing: my roomate thought it was funny that we call the white part of the egg the "white" but the yelllow part "the yolk". instead of the "yellow". in french apparently its called the white and the yellow. that seems more logical than the english way.
ok i guess that wasnt funny like laugh out loud funny but it was amusing in an 'ah, hmm... yes, so true, anna, tell me more" kind of way. anyways... im leaving. good. bye.
anyways, something weird i have noticed throughout my stay in francia is that everytime i talk to a french person, one of the first things they ask me once they hear that fierce american accent is "so... have u made friends with any french people?" and when i say "some, but its kind of hard with the language barrier" (read: "no, its kind of hard cuz ur all pretty frigid and reserved") and theyre like yeah... french people are hard to get to know. this happened twice in th past 24 hours. its so annoying. its like all french people know this about themselves and they get a kick out of pointing it out to me and stomping on all my dreams of ever truly immersing myself in this place. i think my french is still pretty shitty in terms of being completely fluent, but im at a point where i can communicate with frenchies and be understood and contribute to converstation. so its not just the language barrier. its parisiens with their icy-cold demeanor and chic haircuts. especially at sciences po. although, i have noticed that once u actually break the ice with a french eprson they have always been really really nice. so ive come to the conclusion that frenchies (yes, even parisians) are actually nice, warm and interested people, you just have to make a super effort to actually get to the their warm and fuzzy core. the same went with my roomate, who i think is even more friendly than the average parisian. shes never super bubbly at first but if i initate converstaion sehs really cool. thus, my goal for next semester: pounce on french kids in my classes until they become my friends. every. last. one of. them... i. like. writing. like. this. it. is. very. dramatic. dont. u .think. ? .
anyhooooo what else what else?? nothing, i will go be responsible now and read about the dangers of nuclear energy as an alternative to carbon. snoooooooozeeefest. ill be dead before this ish really affects me anyways. maybe that's what ill write for my 3-hour essay test on global warming. "et alors? je serai morte" fin.
things i like about france: they have this store here in france called "piccard" and basically it only sells frozen food. nothing else. when u walk into the store its like walking into the frozen food section of a supermarket but u magically by-pass all the vegetables and cereal and stupid crap... cut to the chase: pizza bagels and frozen lentils. anyways, its really weird and its the only store in france ive seen where they actually BAG your groceries for you. everywhere else is so annoying... here they just hurriedly scan all ur items and push them to the side and then make u pay really quick;ly cuz theres always a huge line behind u (when is there NOT a huge line to do ANYHTING in this country... i mean its not as bad as communist russia im assuming but pretty darn close) and then you are left to bag your own shit while the next person in line is starting to be helped. and the cashregister lady jsut pushes all the new person's things with yours so ur frantically trying to bag ur stupid groceries and then the plastic gets stuck together at the openning (u know what im talkin about) and u cant freakin open it and meanwhile gallons of some1 else's milk are being shoved over your way and crushing ur bread and omg its actually the most stressful thing i have ever experienced. no compassion from the check-out lady either... even if she sees u drowning in ur own gluttony and cant bag all the ccrap u just bought she wont stop and help u out or even wait like HALF a second before letting an avalanch of the person-behind-you's stuff fall into yours. wow im feeling my blood pressure rise jsut htinking about it. why did i bring this up? o yeah... piccarddd.... coolest store ever. i bought sorbet,,, mango and raspberry. i was very happy with my purchase.
things i dont like about france: no bagging ladies at the supermarket and frigid people. see above post
o, funny thing: my roomate thought it was funny that we call the white part of the egg the "white" but the yelllow part "the yolk". instead of the "yellow". in french apparently its called the white and the yellow. that seems more logical than the english way.
ok i guess that wasnt funny like laugh out loud funny but it was amusing in an 'ah, hmm... yes, so true, anna, tell me more" kind of way. anyways... im leaving. good. bye.
lundi 4 février 2008
banane
hello my babies!
so, keeping with my tradition of writing often and profoundly, i will update this blog-shiz-nit. two very important developments to talk about first: 1) I will soon be the very proud owner of my very own brand-spankin new CARTE DE SEJOUR!. 2) I learned out how say "fanny pack" in french.
Lets start with the latter, as that has impacted my life on an intellectual and somewhat spiritual level, I was at work and this french lady came up to me... circa 40 years old. she was sitting at a table earlier in the night with a bunch of other middle aged frenchies. they already looked out of place cuz the bar i work at usually caters to the younger corwd. cuz its hip u know? i mean would I work at an unhip place? i mean does anyone remember my summer affair with ruby tuesdays on route one south?? anyways... the mature french women were obviously not parisiens, as they were asking ME questions about where to go buck wild on their night out in the city of lights. anytime french people ask me advice about paris, well, i mean. i dunno. anyways. they asked if the bar (its a canadian bar) had any live music events or dancing or "traditional" canadian entertainment. i was like... ummm laddddiessss this is a bar, it aint no moulin rouge. and moreover, i didnt know what they meant as "traditional" canadian entiertainment. i dont think anything comes out of canada. i was gonna say they could watch a hockey game or maybe i can bust out some avril levine on the speakers but instead i said i wasnt sure and that was that. a couple hours later one of the women came back in and asked if she found her "banane". i was confused and didnt understand y she would leave her banana or why she brought it into the canadian bar in the first place. then she kept making this motion with her hands outlining a thing around her lower-abdoman area and i was still confused. then i went to the back to see if anyone left anything resembling bananas and then, there it was, in all its glory, rays of heaven's light shining upin it: a black leather fannypack with four gold stars embroidered on the front. i gave her her banane and she was very happy and left. prob went to one of the peep shows at pigalle. for those readers unfamiliar with the parisian nightlife, pigalle is the shady part of town with all the sex shops, peep shows, caberets, and KFCs. i am frequent flyer of the pigalle area
okay number 2, slightly less important than the banane: tomorrow i will go get my carte de sejour, the one document i should have procured in october that makes me legal in france. ive been living without it and im not supposed to leave france (actually, EU shengan region) without having it or they might not let u back in the country... but i went london and egypt and slovakia without it and i was fine. usually u hand over that USA passport with a coy im-an-american-citizen smile and they just let u do whatever u want. im going to morocco in about 2 weeks and so i am glad to have it for that. but anywys, mardi, 5 fevrier i have my "visite medicale" which u need before they give u ur carte. from what i have heard, this entails old french ladies making u sit topless in a room while they x-ray ur body to make sure ur not a terrorist and hiding bombs or chemical weapons in ur chest cavity or something. in anycase, i am very excited becuase i think they let u keep the x-ray of ur chest and that will be a nice souvenir. the only good thing to come out of french bureacracy.
sooo.... yeah thats some of whats been going on for the past 2 months since ive written. also i went to egypt and israel to visit this girl i know from georgetown. she kinda sucks but i wanted to go to the middle east and shes my in.... anywyas both were very cool nad eye-openning and blah blah and now i have a new fascination with middle eastern culture and people and blah blah. i started a blog post about it a couple weeks ago but i havent finsihed it. maybe if i ever do ill post it and then u can read it.
also, i just returned from lyon yesterday. me and patricka nd roberto when to visit some gtown peepz studying there for 2 days. lyon is a relaly cool city. i was expecting to be disappointed, the way i was with dijon (dijon=lame-oooo) but this was actually really cool. not as cool as paris but u know, it tries. it was quaint and charming but not small and boring, as quaint and charming places tend to become after the first 2 hours of being there. its the gastronomical (i think i spelled that word wrong) capital of france. in practice, this means they eat pigs feet and baby cow heads and call it a meal. the traditional lyonnais food is served at the "bouchon" and we went to one of these and it was a very interewsting experience to say the least. lets just say, the chilled pig's feet salad doused in mayonaise was my favorite. we also went to this "minature museme" where some french guy (or maybe he was swiss... tamAYto, tomAHto) spends his life making little diarama type models of random rooms and buildings. theyre so LIFE-like though. i almost wished i could become smaller like in honey i shrank the kids and live in all his little models. o man i miss that movie.
anyways, lyon was good and i stuffed my face about every two hours and now am probably as big as a house but, u cant go to the gastronomical capital of france and NOT be a glutton. its like... against the rules.
lets seee what else is going on in my o-so-exciting like... o. i went ot the movies last ngiht. saw "charlie wilson;s war"... i think thats what it is in english. here they call it "la guerre selon Charlie Wilson". i really liked. i recommend all to see it. that and Juno. i watched that on the computer and i really like that too. the girl in it is so good i wish i could hang out with her and she could be my friend but i think she might be too cool for me.
anyways, classes ended last week. that means everything is over except for 2 finals, both of which i will not stress out about too much because... i dunno im lazy and i just need to pass so i think with enough praying to allah i will be fine. on the 14th im leacing for morocco(hellllzzzzzzyeeeee!!) for a week and then we are taking the ferry over to southern spain and then making our way over to portugal and flying back to paris 1st of mars. then CLASSES.. wait omg a pigeon just ran into the window in my housre. omg that was so scary. omg now its sitting ont he ledge looking at me. ... ok it just flew away. phew! that was close.
assssssss i was saying before rudely interrupted by frenchie pigeon... classes start teh 3rd of march. kind of funny our semesters are so weird ehre... 2nd semester starts as most americans are having their spring breaks. in general i dont mind it but it does make the first semester feel like it last FOREVER... i just want it to be done and over with so i can be in morocco and chill with the muslums.
also, new apartment (well... not so new anymore) is nice. i love having my own space its really great. i wish i got to see my roomate more but seeing as january was hell month (i actually had SCHOOLWORK TO DO??? what is this crappp... the study in the "study abroad" decided to peeps its little head into my life) and i was working a lot and i went to lyon to be a fat-ass sooo we havent crossed paths. one night though we were eatring dinner and i was trying to explain to her different accents in america and then i showed her the mike myers skit on snl with the jewish ladies and thier brroklyn accent and she got a kick out of that. she really likes hearing about american culture and stuff. i showerd her some jerry seinfeld stand upt too although he was speaking too quickly so i dont think she understood a lot of it. she knows some english but not too much. also i like her because shes not super clean and either am i so i dont feel nervous about doing th dishes right away and stuff. over the summer i lived with cleano-nazis karima and alysa and they always blamed me when i didnt follow the "cleaning schedule" they so cornily posted on the fridge that no one else followed either but somehow i was the butt of the house-cleaning jokes. here me and camille can live in our own filth and be happy as clams. just kidding it really isnt dirty at all and i make sure i keep all the common areas nice and tidy (my room is a different story) but shes laid back and u know, im chill wit dat.
ow my head hurts. i dont know why.
ok i will finish by one thing i like about france and one thing i dont like so much:
like about france: les 'soldes". in france they dont have sales throughout the year like they do in the US but instead these this 6 week period or so when all stores are mandated by law to have sales. it started in january and i think its ending very soon. the first weekend of the sales are supposed to have the best discounts but this is also when the entire french population does its shopping so its really crowded. i didt go those days but i went last week pour faire du shopping and uhh,,, i dont wanna brag but i got me some of dem bargains.
don't like about france: old buildings dont have elevators. my apartment is on the 5th floor (which in france means the 6th) and its all stairs and it sucks walking up there. it makes leaving the house such a chore cuz once u leave the house u LEAVE the house... u cant jsut come back in like half an hour if u forget something because then u have to climb the stairs. i guess u could but i mean i prefer to stay on flat land. ascending into the heavens just aint my cup o' tea.
so, keeping with my tradition of writing often and profoundly, i will update this blog-shiz-nit. two very important developments to talk about first: 1) I will soon be the very proud owner of my very own brand-spankin new CARTE DE SEJOUR!. 2) I learned out how say "fanny pack" in french.
Lets start with the latter, as that has impacted my life on an intellectual and somewhat spiritual level, I was at work and this french lady came up to me... circa 40 years old. she was sitting at a table earlier in the night with a bunch of other middle aged frenchies. they already looked out of place cuz the bar i work at usually caters to the younger corwd. cuz its hip u know? i mean would I work at an unhip place? i mean does anyone remember my summer affair with ruby tuesdays on route one south?? anyways... the mature french women were obviously not parisiens, as they were asking ME questions about where to go buck wild on their night out in the city of lights. anytime french people ask me advice about paris, well, i mean. i dunno. anyways. they asked if the bar (its a canadian bar) had any live music events or dancing or "traditional" canadian entertainment. i was like... ummm laddddiessss this is a bar, it aint no moulin rouge. and moreover, i didnt know what they meant as "traditional" canadian entiertainment. i dont think anything comes out of canada. i was gonna say they could watch a hockey game or maybe i can bust out some avril levine on the speakers but instead i said i wasnt sure and that was that. a couple hours later one of the women came back in and asked if she found her "banane". i was confused and didnt understand y she would leave her banana or why she brought it into the canadian bar in the first place. then she kept making this motion with her hands outlining a thing around her lower-abdoman area and i was still confused. then i went to the back to see if anyone left anything resembling bananas and then, there it was, in all its glory, rays of heaven's light shining upin it: a black leather fannypack with four gold stars embroidered on the front. i gave her her banane and she was very happy and left. prob went to one of the peep shows at pigalle. for those readers unfamiliar with the parisian nightlife, pigalle is the shady part of town with all the sex shops, peep shows, caberets, and KFCs. i am frequent flyer of the pigalle area
okay number 2, slightly less important than the banane: tomorrow i will go get my carte de sejour, the one document i should have procured in october that makes me legal in france. ive been living without it and im not supposed to leave france (actually, EU shengan region) without having it or they might not let u back in the country... but i went london and egypt and slovakia without it and i was fine. usually u hand over that USA passport with a coy im-an-american-citizen smile and they just let u do whatever u want. im going to morocco in about 2 weeks and so i am glad to have it for that. but anywys, mardi, 5 fevrier i have my "visite medicale" which u need before they give u ur carte. from what i have heard, this entails old french ladies making u sit topless in a room while they x-ray ur body to make sure ur not a terrorist and hiding bombs or chemical weapons in ur chest cavity or something. in anycase, i am very excited becuase i think they let u keep the x-ray of ur chest and that will be a nice souvenir. the only good thing to come out of french bureacracy.
sooo.... yeah thats some of whats been going on for the past 2 months since ive written. also i went to egypt and israel to visit this girl i know from georgetown. she kinda sucks but i wanted to go to the middle east and shes my in.... anywyas both were very cool nad eye-openning and blah blah and now i have a new fascination with middle eastern culture and people and blah blah. i started a blog post about it a couple weeks ago but i havent finsihed it. maybe if i ever do ill post it and then u can read it.
also, i just returned from lyon yesterday. me and patricka nd roberto when to visit some gtown peepz studying there for 2 days. lyon is a relaly cool city. i was expecting to be disappointed, the way i was with dijon (dijon=lame-oooo) but this was actually really cool. not as cool as paris but u know, it tries. it was quaint and charming but not small and boring, as quaint and charming places tend to become after the first 2 hours of being there. its the gastronomical (i think i spelled that word wrong) capital of france. in practice, this means they eat pigs feet and baby cow heads and call it a meal. the traditional lyonnais food is served at the "bouchon" and we went to one of these and it was a very interewsting experience to say the least. lets just say, the chilled pig's feet salad doused in mayonaise was my favorite. we also went to this "minature museme" where some french guy (or maybe he was swiss... tamAYto, tomAHto) spends his life making little diarama type models of random rooms and buildings. theyre so LIFE-like though. i almost wished i could become smaller like in honey i shrank the kids and live in all his little models. o man i miss that movie.
anyways, lyon was good and i stuffed my face about every two hours and now am probably as big as a house but, u cant go to the gastronomical capital of france and NOT be a glutton. its like... against the rules.
lets seee what else is going on in my o-so-exciting like... o. i went ot the movies last ngiht. saw "charlie wilson;s war"... i think thats what it is in english. here they call it "la guerre selon Charlie Wilson". i really liked. i recommend all to see it. that and Juno. i watched that on the computer and i really like that too. the girl in it is so good i wish i could hang out with her and she could be my friend but i think she might be too cool for me.
anyways, classes ended last week. that means everything is over except for 2 finals, both of which i will not stress out about too much because... i dunno im lazy and i just need to pass so i think with enough praying to allah i will be fine. on the 14th im leacing for morocco(hellllzzzzzzyeeeee!!) for a week and then we are taking the ferry over to southern spain and then making our way over to portugal and flying back to paris 1st of mars. then CLASSES.. wait omg a pigeon just ran into the window in my housre. omg that was so scary. omg now its sitting ont he ledge looking at me. ... ok it just flew away. phew! that was close.
assssssss i was saying before rudely interrupted by frenchie pigeon... classes start teh 3rd of march. kind of funny our semesters are so weird ehre... 2nd semester starts as most americans are having their spring breaks. in general i dont mind it but it does make the first semester feel like it last FOREVER... i just want it to be done and over with so i can be in morocco and chill with the muslums.
also, new apartment (well... not so new anymore) is nice. i love having my own space its really great. i wish i got to see my roomate more but seeing as january was hell month (i actually had SCHOOLWORK TO DO??? what is this crappp... the study in the "study abroad" decided to peeps its little head into my life) and i was working a lot and i went to lyon to be a fat-ass sooo we havent crossed paths. one night though we were eatring dinner and i was trying to explain to her different accents in america and then i showed her the mike myers skit on snl with the jewish ladies and thier brroklyn accent and she got a kick out of that. she really likes hearing about american culture and stuff. i showerd her some jerry seinfeld stand upt too although he was speaking too quickly so i dont think she understood a lot of it. she knows some english but not too much. also i like her because shes not super clean and either am i so i dont feel nervous about doing th dishes right away and stuff. over the summer i lived with cleano-nazis karima and alysa and they always blamed me when i didnt follow the "cleaning schedule" they so cornily posted on the fridge that no one else followed either but somehow i was the butt of the house-cleaning jokes. here me and camille can live in our own filth and be happy as clams. just kidding it really isnt dirty at all and i make sure i keep all the common areas nice and tidy (my room is a different story) but shes laid back and u know, im chill wit dat.
ow my head hurts. i dont know why.
ok i will finish by one thing i like about france and one thing i dont like so much:
like about france: les 'soldes". in france they dont have sales throughout the year like they do in the US but instead these this 6 week period or so when all stores are mandated by law to have sales. it started in january and i think its ending very soon. the first weekend of the sales are supposed to have the best discounts but this is also when the entire french population does its shopping so its really crowded. i didt go those days but i went last week pour faire du shopping and uhh,,, i dont wanna brag but i got me some of dem bargains.
don't like about france: old buildings dont have elevators. my apartment is on the 5th floor (which in france means the 6th) and its all stairs and it sucks walking up there. it makes leaving the house such a chore cuz once u leave the house u LEAVE the house... u cant jsut come back in like half an hour if u forget something because then u have to climb the stairs. i guess u could but i mean i prefer to stay on flat land. ascending into the heavens just aint my cup o' tea.
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